MY VERY FIRST FLIGHT Copyright 1999.   0H ITS MY VERY FIRST FLIGHT I NERVOUSLY SAID AS I BOARDED THE PLANE BOUND FOR THE MED.. YOU WILL BE JUST FINE THE HOSTESS CHUCKLED JUST FASTEN YOUR SEAT BELT AND KEEP IT BUCKLED   THANK YOU I SAID, BUT SHE STRUCK ME AS ODD SHE WORE A SNORKEL AND SANG NEARER MY GOD BUT I BRUSHED IT ASIDE, SHE WAS REALLY QUITE SWEET IN HER BLUE DIVERS OUTFIT AND FLIPPERED FEET   DO THESE PLANES CRASH OFTEN I ASKED WITH PANIC NO JUST THE ONCE SHE SAID LOOKING QUITE MANIC IF ANYONE SHOULD WORRY ITS THE CAPTAIN YOU KNOW HE'S THE POOR SOUL WITH THE VERTIGO   GOOD MORNING ... SAID THE VOICE, YOUR CAPTAIN SPEAKING THERE WILL BE A DELAY, WE HAVE A FUEL PIPE LEAKING, JUST STAY VERY CALM AND PLEASE DO NOT SMOKE OH AND HANDS UP THOSE PRONE TO A SEIZURE OR STROKE   GOOD AFTERNOON ... SAID THE VOICE, ITS YOUR CAPTAIN AGAIN THE FUEL PIPES NOW FIXED ON THIS MAGNIFICENT PLANE JUST GIVE US AN HOUR, WELL BE UP AND GONE AS SOON AS WE FIX THE PROPELLER BACK ON   GOOD EVENING ... SAID THE VOICE, ITS YOUR CAPTAIN ONCE MORE WE HAVE A SLIGHT PROBLEM WITH THE LEFT HAND SIDE DOOR THERE'S NO NEED TO PANIC. ITS JUST MISSING A NUT OH IT CLOSES ALL RIGHT BUT THE THING WONT STAY SHUT   GOOD MORNING ... SAID THE VOICE, COME ON GUESS WHO HAVE I GOT WONDERFUL NEWS FOR YOU, ITS LIFT OFF TIME WE ARE READY TO FLY SO TIGHTEN THOSE SEAT BELTS, LETS HEAD FOR THE SKY   HELLO ... SAID THE VOICE, ITS ME IN THE COCKPIT THAT TAKE OFF WAS BRILLIANT, YOU'VE GOT TO ADMIT IT THIS OLD PLANE MAY BE RUSTY, AND LOOK QUITE PODG BUT SHE SOARS LIKE A BIRD, ITS THE LANDING THATS DODGY   HELLO! HELLO! YOUR CAPTAIN SPEAKING AGAIN ALL OBESE PASSENGERS TO THE REAR OF THE PLANE THERE IS NO NEED TO PANIC. WE ARE ALL IN WITH A CHANCE IF WE CAN STRAIGHTEN HER UP. BEFORE SHE NOSE DIVES ON FRANCE   HI, SAID THE VOICE THIS IS CAPTAIN MEEK THAT NAUGHTY FUEL PIPE HAS SPRUNG ANOTHER LEAK SO, JUST FOR A WHILE WE WILL BE FLYING QUITE LOW AND WHO KNOWS. IT MIGHT CLEAR THIS OLD VERTIGO   HELLO! CAN ANYONE HEAR ME, ITS YOUR CAPTAIN AGAIN IF YOU LOOK OUT THE LEFT SIDE, YOU WILL SEE SUNNY SPAIN NOW LOOK TO THE RIGHT, SEE THAT DINGY BOBBING IN THE SEA YOU WILL NEVER BELIEVE IT, THAT CHAP WAVING IS ME   Back